"When I was ten I was addicted to ghost stories": Belfast-based singer A.N.J.A. on following your passion, her new EP "Digital Love Spells" and on getting by as a musician during the Pandemic
So are you looking forward to going home to Belfast?
I do, yes I do...I hope to be able to really start with playing music again in Belfast. I had a break. I mean I've released music and I've done online things. But I haven't gigged at all, obviously. So I hope to get the ball rolling again. I'm looking forward to that and I hope there are some possibilities for me. I busk as well in the street.
What's it like at the moment, are the pubs open?
Not so much, only those
which serve food. And some of them have live music I've heard. It was
tough before to get gigs. It was never easy. But now I think it is
five million times harder. I'll find a way hopefully.
The Corona pandemic must have been pretty tough for you.
Yes it was. I lost all my gigs, my job basically. I couldn't believe it. For us musicians there is little support. If we lose everything, we are not in a very secure position. But that's the same for every artist in every country probably. I got a little bit of financial help by a UK organisation called „Help Musicians“. They have been a great help to me. They have a sort of fund for musicians who were struggling due to Corona.
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| A.N.J.A. in her German hometown Ravensburg. |
You took a big decision to move to Belfast. I guess it takes a lot of courage and it's admirable that you did that.
Thank you!
And it's so cool that it works out for you. I mean there's so much stuff that you can't really plan. So what was the trigger in the end? Did you decide spontaneously or was it planned?
It was not planned. Like you say, most of these things you can't even plan. It was always my dream to move to Ireland for a while. But I never really did anything to achieve that dream until I applied for the European Voluntary Service (EVS). I had several applications on the side, but I was really happy when I got that interview in Belfast and I got that placement. I knew this was gonna change something. I didn't know that it would change something music-wise. But I knew I had to leave. I've been in Southern Germany for too long. I've been living and doing a lot of things here but nothing felt really right. I wasn't really happy with anything I was doing. Job, university, internships were all good, I'm not being ungrateful for anything I did here, but I always felt lost and that there's something else for me. I had the urge to express myself. Recently before I moved to Belfast I had discovered music and singing but I thought it would be a nice hobby, that it would not become more than that. When I was in Belfast, I was like „I'll give it a go – I can't lose anything“. Maybe because I was so bored before I was thinking „What's the worst that can happen? When people don't like it, I'll move on.” I don't know where I got that courage from. But I did it and it turned out really well. I didn't expect that at all. I was never someone who thought to be destined to become a famous person. Maybe that's a good thing. Maybe I am more relaxed. I don't have to become famous. I love to get some recognition, everybody does. If it's a small circle of listeners, that's nice, it's a dedicated audience. I don't have to be the next Lady Gaga. I don't think I will be – not with the music I make.
It's great that you can make a living with your music. I'm sure it's not easy though.
Yes, I never thought that would be possible. I think it would be more difficult in Germany as the live music scene is not that big. Before Corona, it went really well with the gigs in Belfast, the busking and doing a couple of things next to it, but not a proper 9-to-5-job – which is something that didn't make me happy. I hope that it gets better. At the moment I'm not where I can have a „Bausparvertrag“ and all these things. For now it's okay, you have to look at what you have and what you are spending. Some musicians in Ireland that are well known and have five gigs a week can afford a house and a car. That would be great. I'm not there yet and with Corona we don't know.
Why did you choose Belfast?
It's the biggest city in Northern Ireland. The other big city would be the Irish capital Dublin in the south. It was mere chance. When I looked for the EVS opportunities online, there were hardly any in Dublin. And I really wanted to do the EVS to have some support. I did not just want to move there and don't know where to go or stay. There were lots of opportunities in Belfast so I took one there. I could have imagined living in England or Scotland too. But then it was Belfast.
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| A.N.J.A. likes to hell stories with her songs. Photos: Tinnitus Attacks |
So when did you make that decision and how did it all work out?
I started this in spring
2017. It was a placement in a charity organiation called „Volunteer
Now“. They promoted voluntary work to get people to help elderly
or disabled people. I had a 9- to-5-job in the office,
administration, PR, a bit of this, a bit of that. In my free time I
was looking to do some fun things with music. That's what eventually
brought me onto that road. After that year I sad “ok that's it, I'm
gonna try and be a musician full time”. It was a brave decision but
it worked out.
Let's talk about your new EP and musical influences. Your sound is a bit morbid and dark (which I love).
Yes, that's me!
Do you want to go into the details what the songs are about?
Yeah, like you said, they're a bit morbid. I have a fascination for these things, dark mysteries. A lot of my songs are story-based. They are not solely auto-biographical, I don't just write about my feelings or myself. Obviously everything that is about me is in the songs too, I put something of myself in it. The first song I ever released was „Black River Falls“. It's about this story I read about this place in America called Black River Falls. At the end of the 19th century, lots of dark horrible things happened there, people went crazy, it's written down and documented how...I don't even know how to describe this because there were so many things going on. People were setting themselves on fire out of nowhere, people were being killed, people were going mental...you have to read about it. It happened in Wisconsin, it's like a bleak american gothic nightmare. That inspired me so much when I read about it in a magazine a while ago. I thought I could write about this.
That sounds amazing! I saw the photo on your Instagram account with the hooded figures.
Yes, that is it! I love a bit of story and atmosphere. I like folkore, I love history, I love murder mystery and murder ballads. There are lots of things that inspire me, songs, but also things from my childhood like this audiobook „The little witch“, „Die kleine Hexe“. I loved it and I love it still. It's so atmospheric! In the old version they have this great intro, just an instrumental. It influenced a lot of my songs, actually I took bits and bops of it...
Intermission: I know „Die kleine Hexe“, I think every kid in Germany knows it (at least I hope so – if you don't, please ask your parents WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THEM??!). But I couldn't recall that intro. So I looked it up and I was astonished how cool it sounds. And I could definitely hear how it has influenced Anja. Check it out on Youtube. Ok, now on with the interview.)
...because it's haunting and wonderful and beautiful and sad. I am a melancholic type, you know. I also draw my inspiration from fairytales but with a dark twist. My own experiences, my own failures.
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| A.N.J.A. has a fascination for the dark and morbid. |
(Me, pretending to be shocked) Your own experiences of being a witch?
I've always been fascinated by the witch culture, from my childhood on. And I think at the moment it is a trend again and I think it has a lot to do with feminist feelings in the air. The witch is an powerful independent woman and that's how I feel I am too. And mixing that with a soft spot for the dark and magical things is perfect for me. I don't have experiences like seeing ghosts – unfortunately.
Maybe that's a good thing? You know you might not get rid of them once you called them...
I know, I guess I should be thankful. I've talked to people who have had experiences with ghosts. I am always drawn to it but I'm also very scared of it. I always loved ghost stories as a child even though they were making me so afraid I was crying. When I was ten I was addicted to those stories, scared and thrilled at the same time. It's like people watching murder documentaries these days. They all love watching it like I do, we're all sensationalists, but in our safe space at home.
Same goes for the fascination of horror movies: Experiencing horrible things on screen that you would never want to experience in real life.
Exactly. Getting a thrill from a safe distance. And with my songs I like to tell stories for my audience. Guide them into my world and tell them about witchy weird things. I love when they're sitting there listening really carefully. I've had people tell me „Once you started singing I could see your songs, I was in your world“. That's the greatest compliment, that's exactly what I want to achieve. I love to communicate and tell stories, being an entertainer and giving the people a bit of escapism. That's why people read books, watch movies and listen to songs. I want them to have a feeling like being on a great adventure or being haunted and spooked.
What kind of music influenced you?
The first music I ever loved was grunge music, Nirvana especially. Melancholic heavier stuff: I love that kind of music and that state of being. Grunge is still in the back of my head. But I'm very much into 60ies music, psychedelic rock and folk. Artists like Vasthi Bunyan: She has this sweet voice and her music is completely handmade, as is mine. Little acoustic guitars, flutes and so on. My sound is darker though, her stuff is really lovely. She inspired me to record in my bedroom. My partner Christopher brought me onto that and said „You could do that too, you're talented and your style is a bit similar“. She did this at home and it sounds very atmospheric. So I thought I'd give it a go, too. I love music from the 60ies and 70ies because it is mesmerizing, hypnotic and has this LSD vibe. I'm a big fan of the Beatles for example and Jefferson Airplane. And there's this instrument called Theremin, maybe you know it. I love everything played with that. I have a Theremin pedal that I used on my track "Men Will Die Tonight". I would love to get into playing a real Theremin one day. It sounds so beautiful, haunting and weird. One of the greatest vocalists is Amy Winehouse. I'm not a modern singer, I prefer Soul and Jazz singers to the popular R&B-Style. That's not me, I'm more into the jazzy and bluesy vocals. That's what I'm singing too. People have said to me that I have quite a jazzy voice. I don't know, maybe that's true. I love the grandes dames of the Jazz era like Peggy Lee.
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You play the electric guitar. I can imagine it's not easy getting by with handmade music. Guitar-based music is not as popular right now as it was some years back.
It's always the question: Do you stick to your thing and do what you really want to do? Or do you want to go commercial? I don't want to play electronic music. Some people love that too, but it's not my thing. But as long as there is an audience for everything it's ok.
Did you do home recordings before Corona hit? It's quite a thing now, artists staying home and broadcasting from there. Could come in pretty handy right now for you...
This is true. I started last autumn, but I haven't done it regularly, just recorded my EP really. The trend is going to home recording. People are really good at it so I have a lot to learn. I started it from scratch. Never done it before. When I recorded my first songs, Chris's little brother Jack accompanied me. He studies music technology and he's extremely good at it. He has his own band and he records loads of young musicians from around, friends and students. So we recorded some songs, very basic, almost just guitar and vocals. Jack played a bit of bass. The only song of those three that I released was „Black River Falls“. That gave me the inspiration to try this completely myself. I'll never be as good as him, at least not anytime soon, but I knew that if I was just on my own and have all the time in the world I could be really creative and find exactly what I want, I could add five million layers if I want, and I wouldn't feel awkward. If you're recording in the studio with other people, you're nervous, you want to do it right, it's a lot of pressure, you can feel embarassed. At least I do because I don't have the routine yet. Maybe it's easy peasy if you've been doing it for years. But I wasn't in that stage yet.
So how went the recording when you were on your own?
I got myself this recording device, I read a little bit about what you really need. I had most of the equipment already from gigging. So I have the instruments, leads (cables) (?) and a small amp, not a great one, a microphone and I only needed this recorder, a small investment. Then I turned it on and just played. It's very easy to handle because it has everything on it so you don't need a computer, you can mix it directly with the recorder. Quickly it sounded really ok, like, actual songs. I could do as many takes as I wanted, I had no inhibitions to sing or put some weird flutes on some track. If anyone would have seen me doing this they would have thought I'd lost my mind because I did this weird out of tune flute noise but it really works well.
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| A.N.J.A. wants music to be authentic. |
You play the flute as well?
Well I don't, but I do on the tracks. I can't really do it. But the cool thing is I don't have to because it worked really well with that forest atmosphere for example on „Burning Hearts“ and „Between The Midnight Trees“. It sounds like a far cry of some weird animal or Pan playing the flute. That's what I was having in mind. I do these things intuitively. I only learned playing the guitar but I'm not a great guitarist because I didn't really stick to it so much until a couple of years ago when I picked it up again.
So tell me more about the recording process.
The first take is often the best because you're just going for it. If you try to recreate what you just did but better there's too much in your head, you're overthinking and it's never as good as one of the first spontaneous outbursts of creativity. „Between The Midnight Trees“ was just one day of recording. I just used the first version because I thought that if I tried again it just might not have that feeling and not be right. It seems to work. I think I have the musical talent but not the technical knowledge. To be a perfect musician you need talent plus maybe the theoretical knowledge. I don't have that but if I acquire it, I can become really good at recording. It's been a big learning journey. Over the past couple of years I have changed so much and I've learned so much. All the things I do now I could have never imagined. The home recording is a really great. My recordings aren't perfect because it's difficult: On this recorder you cannot edit anything. You can't do pitch control or copy and paste anything so this is all real, authentic.
That's cool! Is it an analogue recorder?
No, it's digital. I was actually wondering if I should call my EP „Analogue Love Spells“ – but actually it is a digital recorder so it had to be „Digital Love Spells“. But it's all one take. You can't repeat that, you have to start from the top. I did it all one by one, so if you do the vocals right and screw up another part, you can still use the vocals. I don't have a band, I do everything myself. It's really different from what many musicians do at the moment. There's not only the trend of electronic music but also everything is really well produced, even independent artists go to studios and have really good producers. In the end they have really stylish perfect mixes or masters of their tracks. It sounds perfect but I like my way and artists that do it similarly because it's authentic and personal as opposed to copy and paste tracks. I can tell from the few times I've been to a studio – they do that to make everything sound perfect and flawless. I can't do this. I like that it's imperfect. I wish there was more of a trend to guitar-based handmade music and authentic recordings. Musicians could reach people in a different way than a really well produced commercial song that lacks personality.
It's all become so interchangeable. Listen to Rihanna and then to something else, it all sounds the same. I was surprised when I heard Lady Gaga play piano and sing "The Sound of Music" at the Oscars 2015. I was like „You can sing soo good, why don't I hear that in your hit singles?“
Oh yes, I have seen this! She has an amazing voice but I didn't know before that either. And the hit songs are how she gets all her money. That's the sad reality of the music industry: You don't have to be a great singer these days to do a pop track with some electronic beats and auto-tune. I still value things like a great voice. It's always good to find likeminded people. For me being an independent musician, I want to get my music out there but people maybe don't like this or think it is not as good because it is not perfect. That's at least my worries because it's all handmade and I feel a bit self-conscious about it. Maybe it's an obstacle for me that people hear so many highly-produced tracks, I don't know. But then on the other hand when you find people that do like your music that's real and a great connection.
I'd rather listen to a song that may be a bit imperfect than to a soulless piece of plastic pop that was designed to sell stuff. So what are your future plans?
I should do more stuff here in Germany again. I've been so focussed on Belfast and its music scene. I left out the German area because I live mostly in Belfast and I can't be here that often. Maybe next year. There are some opportunities here.
Like Club Vaudeville in Lindau or Kulturladen in Konstanz.
Yeah, I've been there once. I studied in Konstanz.
Oh sure, I read that!
Long time ago... well, not so long ago. I studied German and English literature there. But I didn't want to pursue my academic way. At that time I actually considered being a writer. I guess I found my outlet with the music. It combines the storytelling with the music. I was into literature and writing very much. I thought one day I will be journalist or work in a publishing house. I did an internship at the PR department of Ravensburger, but I realized it isn't a hundred percent. The music is more what I want. And now because I'm a DIY musician I have to do the everything myself, even the PR.
Could you name your favorite book? Or is there more than one? And do you have a favorite author?
Uh, my favorite book...hm. Well, one of my favorite authors is Edgar Allan Poe. That's a typical Anja answer. I love his short stories, the dark twisty psychology of the human mind and madness. I love it! But I also love a lot of German writers, Goethe for example. And I'm very much into poetry, which I focussed on during my studies. Maybe that was the way to songwriting. Some songs are poems. One of my favorite books would be „Das Parfum“ by Patrick Süskind. I love that. Very evocative, very atmospheric and dark, historical and very descriptive...amazing. I love when you feel like you're smelling or seeing things just by reading. That's what I want to do with my songs. You can escape into a different world and (she inhales like she's terrified of something) ...erschaudernd...hach, wonderful! It always has a beauty, all these things. There is a quote by Edgar Allan Poe: „The death of a beautiful woman is, unquestionably, the most poetical topic in the world.“ And I thought „Wow, you are so right!“. That's so weird. But it's this combination of dark and beauty. I have a fascination for that.
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| Subtlety and Delicacy are important for A.N.J.A. |
Maybe in a parallel universe you are a gothic metal singer, who knows? Like Liv Kristine from Theatre of Tragedy.
Hm, yeah, it's not a hundred percent my thing. But I do like it. It's just...I like a bit more subtlety in my music. It's not just (imitates double bass drum)...I like Rock, but Metal not so much. I'm not completely adverse to it but I need a bit more delicacy and a bit more haunting as opposed to the (imitates generic metal song). I know there are some great female singers like Simone Simons from Epica. She delivers a great vocal performance, but it's not quite my direction. People should be able to delve into my music. You can't really get lost in the story if the music is over the top.
Let's talk about your musical origins.
So I have to start at the start – with my mom. She is not a professional singer but she has two bands and they play gigs here in the region. She had these bands for maybe ten years now, but she always sang since I can remember. I was like a typical child: „Stop singing, you're embarassing me“. When I was six years old I recorded myself because I thought singing was fun and maybe I could become a singer one day. And then I listened to the sounds on my little recorder and it was horrible. I was so gutted that I buried that dream. I was a child and my voice would changed completely but I really thought singing is not for me, I'll just leave that to my mum. For the next fifteen years I focussed on the writing. For three years I learned to play guitar but I was still a child and I just stopped and didn't pick it up in my teenage years. I admired musicians like Kurt Cobain and I had an electric guitar but I never played it. I just dreamed of being a rockstar like him. I never completely forgot about this but I never gave it much of a chance. After university I had some free time that I really needed. I was really exhausted and not feeling very creative. That's when I started picking up my guitar again. I was at home so much, I was writing my bachelor thesis. I felt the creativity flowing again. And I started singing while playing the guitar just for myself in my room. Singing was fun, it made me happy. But noone should ever listen to it but my mum and my dad heard it a little bit. They said it sounds really good. My mum always wanted me to sing and believed that I could and just had to dare to do it, find your confidence. But I didn't believe it.
Well I believe it too. And you must have finally believed it, else we wouldn't be sitting here.
I met some cool people, some good friends who are also very much into music. Before that my friends loved music but they didn't make it themselves. I didn't really have that circle to find likeminded people in a musical sense. Then I found those people and they were just singing at every party and play the guitar. I thought it was amazing and started singing too. They told me I was a great singer – and I started believing this and told my mom about this. She said „I knew it Anja“ and she had a singing teacher at that time. She is really cool and I went there because my mum encouraged me. I was so nervous – the first time singing with a microphone. It was my confidence lacking, I thought noone wants to listen to this. Then I had this couple of singing lessons and she gave me a lot of confidence. She said „You are a fantastic singer and I can't even really teach you much“. I didn't know where this was coming from. She said that I seem to have natural talent for this and that my voice is really pure. A lot of singers these days have this Ariana Grande style (imitates singing sounds). The way I sing is quite natural. I learned to sing in the microphone, in total it was six lessons. Then I left to Belfast anyway. She had shown me the variety of songs I could sing. That's how it started. I didn't think it would turn into my career.
Are you looking for a band?
At the moment I would like to keep it solo. I like being independent, doing everything myself. Sometimes it's hard because it's nice to have people around that back you up. For the live gigs it would be good to have a band eventually, guitar, bass, drums, some harmony. But I don't want to start a different project. It should be my music. If I want to be a headliner I should have a band, it's a better concert experience, but for now it's good. I haven't made a plan because everything is at a standstill and live gigs aren't happening. I'll see. I don't have a plan for the future or how long Chris and me will stay in Belfast. So in the long run I see myself with a band for live gigs. For the recording I need a drummer. I can do everything to record but not the drums.
I don't suppose you have plans to return to Germany in the near future?
Not yet, but in the long run probably. But maybe not to Ravensburg. I don't know. Chris and me eventually want to be in Germany probably. He really loves Germany. At the moment I love being free and living this adventure. When we settle down it will probably be Germany because it's a great country and a great place to live. Very secure as well. All the securities I don't have at the moment – eventually I want them. When you want to have family I would love to do this in Germany. But maybe in a big city – or bigger than Ravensburg, where there's more opportunities for music. It's not that I don't like Ravensburg, it's just with my art and Chris's art, something like Munich or would be cool. But it's all in the open. I'm living my life and don't plan much. But it's all gonna work out like it has before I guess.
So that's everything that I've prepared except for the question about the red Gibson.
Oh, my guitar! It's actually an Epiphone Casino. Red is one of my favorite colours. Signal red grasps people's attention – which is good especially when you're busking. You want people to notice you. I love that it's sort of a retro guitar, that's my vibe. John Lennon played an Epiphone Casino.
Does it have a name?
Yes. (laughs) We call it Maureen. It was a present from my dad. I brought it home to Chris and he was like „Whoa, that's a great guitar!“. I asked him what we should call this big and red and beautiful guitar. And he said „Maureen“ – like Maureen O'Hara, the Irish actress. She was in the classic film „The Quiet Man“. And she's this woman with red flaming hair so Chris thought „Maureen“ was very fitting. I don't call her that so often, but it's her name. A lot of singer/songwriters play acoustic guitar. So it's something different to see me with the electric guitar: „Oh a woman playing electric guitar.“ Yeah, we do that too!
Check out "Digital Love Spells" by A.N.J.A. via Bandcamp or other streaming platforms. Follow A.N.J.A. on Instagram or Facebook to keep yourself updated. You can watch videos of her busking and covering songs as well as performing her own songs on Youtube. On Spotify, there's a Playlist with songs that are close to A.N.J.A.'s heart. And you can read my review of "Digital Love Spells" over at schwäbische.de (written in German, hit me up if you want me to translate it).
On Friday, October 2nd, A.N.J.A. will perform live on soup.ink, a Belfast-based co-operative for artists, musicians, and writers. Check out the Instagram Post below for more information.